Paris, the Capitol of Freedom

To: Speaker J. Dennis Hastert, U.S. House of Representatives
Re: Freedom Fries

Thank you for renaming "french fries" to "freedom fries", but doesn't that make Paris the capitol of Freedom? Perhaps you could substitute frogs' legs on the menu. Also, are you sure about "freedom toast": isn't that what Osama Bin Laden tried to do to New York City, London etc.? The red was blood, not raspberry jam.